Friendship changes as we do.

When we’re younger, it can be easy to think the closest friendships are the ones where you do everything together, agree on everything and talk every day. Over time, we learn that meaningful friendships can look very different — and often teach us something about ourselves along the way.

This International Women’s Friendship Month, Kappa Delta women shared the friendship lessons they’ve learned from the sisters who have grown alongside them.

Choose friends who help you grow

When Lily French joined Epsilon Omega-Kentucky, she worried she wouldn’t know anyone. That changed when she met Ava Berger and, later, Ava Coleman.

The three became inseparable, and Lily credits both friends with encouraging her to step outside her comfort zone.

“They introduced to me what it looked like to be confident in yourself, and they pushed me out of my comfort zone,” Lily shared. Their encouragement eventually helped inspire her to serve as her chapter’s vice president-learning & development.

The friends who believe in us can sometimes see our potential before we see it ourselves. Hold onto the women who encourage you to try, lead and grow into a more confident version of yourself.

Appreciate the friends who are different from you

Aly Kinzie and Evonne Le of Zeta Psi-Valparaiso met during recruitment in 2016 and initially thought they were too different to ever become friends. Instead, those differences became one of the strengths of their friendship.

“Kappa Delta provided us our perfect balance in sisterhood — a reminder that differences don’t divide us, they make our bond stronger,” Aly shared. “In our sisterhood, contrast became connection.”

A good friend doesn’t always think, act or see the world exactly the way you do. Sometimes the women who challenge your perspective are the ones who help you grow the most.

Don’t measure friendship by how often you talk

Anissa Wiant and Haley Anzalone of Alpha Psi-Drury have been there for each other through milestones, celebrations and difficult seasons. Although their friendship began when Anissa became Haley’s big sister in Kappa Delta, it has continued through many stages of adult life.

One of the things Anissa values most is that their friendship doesn’t depend on constant communication.

“We can go days or weeks without talking or seeing each other, and when we reconnect, it feels as though no time has passed at all,” she shared.

As life gets busier, the rhythm of friendship may change. Give each other grace. A strong friendship isn’t always measured by how often you talk, but by the comfort of knowing that person is still in your corner.

Show up in every season

For Anne Williamson and her fellow Delta Lambda-Georgia Southern sisters, friendship has lasted more than 45 years.

The 11 women call themselves “The Groovy Girls.” Although they live in different cities, they talk regularly, travel together and celebrate milestone birthdays. Their friendship has also carried them through the harder moments of life.

“We turn to each other in times of loss, or fear, when we need encouragement and in times to celebrate,” Anne shared. “My Groovy Girl Friends are an extension of my family.”

Friendship isn’t only about being there for the fun moments. Often, the friendships that mean the most are built by showing up again and again — to celebrate, listen, encourage or simply be present.

Hold onto the friends who make you feel seen

Madi Van Hemert met Riley Schaefer through the big/little process in Theta Kappa-Northern Arizona. They didn’t end up becoming big and little, but they did find a friendship Madi says has shaped her collegiate experience.

Riley, she shared, has taught her “that I am not alone, I am seen” and has shown her how to carry herself “with grace, compassion and confidence.”

Pay attention to the women who remind you that you matter. The best friendships give you room to be yourself while also encouraging you to keep becoming who you want to be.

If we could give our younger selves friendship advice, maybe it would be this: Don’t worry so much about whether your friendships look the way you think they should.

Choose women who encourage you. Learn from the friends who are different from you. Give each other grace when life gets busy. Show up when it matters. And never underestimate the impact of a friend who makes you feel truly seen.

Friendship will change as you do. Some of the best friendships will grow right along with you.